I’ve been speaking with a number of my workshop attendees–can you guess what I hear about the most in these conversations?
1. I know the habits I have are not great.
2. I want to change those habits, be healthier but I don’t know where to begin
3. I’ve tried making some changes, and it works for a while but then I get thrown off track and struggle to get back to those bad habits.
Change is rarely easy. We’re often working against some deeply rooted patterns. But it’s not impossible to change those patterns.
Today I’m sharing my top tip for getting started on creating a new habit:
GET CLEAR ON WHY YOU’RE DOING IT.
The first step I take with any client is clarifying why they want to make changes. Understanding what’s sparking this desire to change will keep you anchored to your motivation. It will help you get through the tough times on your journey and remind you why you started in the first place.
And we gotta go deep here. No one wants to lose weight simply because they want to fit in their pants. So it’s important to keep asking yourself “why” in order to get to your deeper desire. For instance, ask yourself: Why do I want to fit in my pants? Why is that important?
And whatever your response is to that question, ask again–well why is that important? I recommend asking yourself “why is that important” about 9 times.
There is always a much deeper reason underlying your desire to change that you may not have admitted to yourself before. Find out what it is.
TIPS: As you ask yourself why, get out of your head. You’ll never find the answers there anyway. See if your responses can come from the heart or the belly. Allow the deeper desire to emerge from your whole self. Try not to edit what comes up. You may want to “free write” or talk into a recorder without worrying about anyone (especially you!) judging what comes out.
Once you’ve got your BIG why answer, write it down.
How powerful can this be? As an example, that client who thought she wanted to lose weight to fit in her pants? She made another discovery. What she really wanted, was to lose weight because she wanted to have more energy to spend time/play with her kids, and to show them that they can do things they set their minds to.
A little more powerful than pants right? And by the way, she’s lost almost 30 pounds.